She Laughs at the Days

For a very large part of my youth I thought the point of being a Christian was to keep bad things from happening to me. After all, the Old Testament has all these covenants, "If you ___, then God will ____."

So if I did all the right things, kept all the rules, did all the things asked of me, then God would protect me and take care of me and keep me safe. I could manipulate the creator of the universe into being my own personal caretaker.

Imagine my surprise, and anger, as I encountered more, and more, pain and suffering in my own life. God was supposed to make me happy. He was supposed to keep my parents marriage together, he was supposed to keep me from feeling sad all the time for no apparent reason. God was failing to hold up his end of the bargain, and so, maybe I was done with God.

Only in the wealthy west could a spoiled little girl hold onto the notion, for any length of time, that it's possible to live a life without suffering.

But I see the same sort of thinki…

Hi.

Remember me?

Can you believe I only posted 4 times in all of 2015?

I let an entire pregnancy go by without saying anything on this blog about it.

That's right. We have another baby here.

He was a total surprise. Such a surprise that I think it took me 4 months just to get used to the idea, while I worked my butt off for months to make sure that once I went into labor important things would still be done, by people I had hopefully trained to take over for me, while I went into newborn baby mode for a while.

In the process I lost my domain, shelaughsatthedays.net.

It expired and the emails were going to a cancelled email address so I didn't notice.

Then, because people used to come and read this little blog of mine, that domain had some good page rank on it. So someone bought that domain and is using it for one of those crappy, no real content, paid advertising websites. Which I refused to do when I owned that domain and it's corresponding traffic. So now someone is prof…